The Guantlet

Before I start, I will say that I'm writing this blog entry on my new monitor. I have entered the world of flat panel and I don't think I'll ever go back. I think I will go through with the hassle and get a fixed/replaced 17" CRT out of ViewSonic. Anyone need?

I don't know whether to blame the weather (cold), the post-holiday let down, or just January in general, but I haven't felt like doing much of anything for a couple of weeks. I guess that's not quite accurate. Practice time is up (few gigs for the band). I'm listening more to my CD collection (now that it's here). I'm catching up on some DVDs every once in a while. Reading here and there. I guess that may sound like a lot. Well, maybe it is, but it doesn't FEEL like that.

Yes, the doldrums. They hit everyone and I think that it is mostly a mental thing. One may be doing stuff, and often times the same stuff, but for some reason, it does not satisfy. The motivation is gone. The good times are definitely over.

After Friday night though, I feel like I'm on the ascent. Ready to break through the smog of listless work-a-day slumption into the brilliant light of motivation.

Friday night was a band party. A "mandatory fun" event. A good time WILL be had by all, and that's a lawful order. Normally I don't like to go for my usual reasons. This one wasn't too bad because it was a family event for the first hour or so. Hence fewer drunk bandsmen which leads to a better possibility for normal interaction. One such interaction was with a fellow bandsman who told me of a friend that he used to play with who went from square to swinging (Melvin to Monk, hapless to hip, Goofus to Gallant, etc.) in a short time. An impressive story, but then...he challenged me to do the same. Sure, thought I, why not?

I may never be a hip swinging jazzer, but that challenge got my motor running. What the heck are my goals? Do I have plans for any of them? Where do I get started? And on and on. Nothing destroys doldrums like having some goals and a plan to get there. Without those goals your mind just thinks it's treading water. You may be doing something, but without goals for a reference, something rapidly loses its significance and slips into nothing.

Armed with that little thesis I've re-eved what I'm practicing, why I'm practicing, tried to rethink my free time, etc. Almost sounds like late new years resolutions, don't they? Well, maybe they are. As long as they keep me doing stuff I'll be happy.